well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
