Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
