Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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