It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
