is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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