That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
