Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
