We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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