your room smells of hookers.
And success
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
