When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
