Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
