That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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