But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
