so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
