i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
