She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
