I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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