Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
