If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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