playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
