some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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