You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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