nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
