I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
50% drunk capacity currently
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
