U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize