the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
