dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
