what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
