i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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