Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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