This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
