So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I can't put those talents on a resume
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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