Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
