it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
