you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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