oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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