i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
