is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize