i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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