I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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