so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
