She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
