hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
