Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
