goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
