I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
my poor anus
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
