Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
