i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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