How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
