coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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