So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
