there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
