so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
