is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
