I understand Curling. That high.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
